Saturday, August 16, 2014

Outlander: Jamie Takes A Beating (Or Two...)

Oh, Outlander. I love you. And Season 2!! Huzzah! (I probably shouldn't use huzzah. I don't want to frighten off any sexy eighteenth century Highlanders that may be near by.) 

Sam Heughan shirtless pic Jamie Fraser Outlander Starz Outlander Jamie Claire, Claire Jamie McTavish, Outlander Jamie Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Shirtless
Jamie Jamie Jamie. First of all, Sam Heughan is just so brilliantly cast. I can't get over it. It's not just that he's supremely attractive (although he is). These first two episodes have convinced me sufficiently that he's a competent actor. And he's got a look that let's him play early 20s Jamie and should work well enough for older Jamie as the series moves forward. Plus -- the Gaelic and the accent. Pardon me while I just go swoon all over the damn place.

Sam Heughan shirtless Jamie Fraser Outlander Claire dresses Jamie's wound Claire Jamie McTavish, Outlander Jamie Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Shirtless
This episode gave us our first taste of the torture fueled Jamie backstory. As Claire properly cleans and dresses Jamie's gunshot wound, she can't help but notice the scarred mess of flesh that makes up his back. Must be a bitch to get that scarring applied for the copious number of shirtless scenes Outlander will contain...

Sam Heughan as Jamie Fraser on Outlander Starz Outlander episode 2 Jamie and Claire, Claire Jamie, Outlander Jamie Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser farmer
Jamie tells the story of the day evil John Randall dropped by the family farm for a bit of mid-afternoon-rape. John Randall is about as mustache twirling as a villain can get without physically twirling any mustache. He just tries to rape everyone he comes across.

Sam Heughan as Jamie Fraser on Outlander Starz Outlander episode 2 Jamie and Claire, Claire and Jamie, Outlander Jamie Sam Heughan Starz Jamie Fraser
There's no good explanation for why the redcoats have showed up, but they have, and they're unpleasant, and Jamie tries to keep them away from his sister. Unfortunately, he's outnumbered. And Jenny doesn't help by running toward the house instead of away from it. Come on, Jenny!! It's horror movie 101. Run AWAY from the house. But! Jenny! She looked exactly right. Two thumbs way up.

Sam Heughan shirtless Jamie Fraser Outlander Starz Outlander Jamie Claire, Claire Jamie McTavish, Outlander Jamie Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Shirtless
Anyway, Jamie fails at freeing Jenny and Randall decides to punish him by stringing him up and flogging him. It's only a little baby flogging though. There's more serious flogging to come. But Jamie would rather be flogged and murdered than have his sister dishonored. Happily and logically, Jenny would rather Jamie live.

Sam Heughan shirtless Jamie Fraser Outlander Jamie Claire, Jamie McTavish Outlander Sam Heughan Jamie Shirtless Jamie gets flogged whipped beaten
Sam Heughan shirtless Jamie Fraser Outlander Jamie Claire, Jamie Outlander Episode 2 Sam Heughan Jamie Shirtless Jamie gets flogged whipped beaten
Ugh. Those eyes. ^^

So Jamie has this awesomely angsty guilt over his sister's decision to accompany Randall into the house rather than let Jamie die. I feel like one could discuss the gender politics in Outlander until the end of time. I love that Jenny chose to save Jamie. I can't imagine many sisters would chose otherwise. But it calls into question this protector role that Jamie thinks he should be filling. If I had more time and energy, I'd tally up the number of times women save men vs. the number of times men save women. I'd probably also count the number of attempted rapes. Was eighteenth century Scotland really as rapey as Outlander would lead us to believe? Or ... do they just happen to have this one really rapey guy in their lives who skews the data?

Sam Heughan as Jamie Fraser on Outlander Starz Outlander Jamie and Claire, Claire and Jamie McTavish, Outlander Jamie Sam Heughan Starz Jamie Fraser
Anyway. After Claire finishes dressing Jamie's wound, she starts thinking about Frank and Jamie comforts her as she weeps over her not-born-yet-husband. It's cute. Until Jamie... reacts? Sheesh. I'll never be a romance writer.

Claire x Jamie Sam Heughan as Jamie Fraser Outlander Episode 2  Starz Jamie Claire, Claire and Jamie, Outlander Jamie Sam Heughan Starz Jamie Fraser
But then Jamie promises he's not-rapey. Which, you wouldn't think someone would have to make a point of telling you. But in this world, it's better to just put it out there. Not. A. Rapist.

Sam Heughan shirtless Jamie Fraser Outlander Starz Outlander Jamie Claire, Claire Jamie McTavish, Outlander Jamie Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Shirtless
It's a little more adorable than that. He actually promises she doesn't need to fear him or anyone else while he's around. I don't know about you, but if I wasn't already planning to spend all my time stalking the one attractive male at the castle, the promise about protecting me from the dozens of rapists in our midst would keep me glued to his hip.

Outlander Stars Jamie and Claire, Jamie Fraser and Claire Randall, Sam Heughan and caitriona balfe as Jamie and Claire, Outlander Jamie Clare Claire x Jamie
Next day, Claire visits Jamie in the stables while he tells her more backstory stuff. He's wanted for murder. Colum and Dougal are his uncles. Blah blah blah -- he's hot.

Sam Heughan as Jamie Fraser on Outlander Starz Outlander Jamie and Claire, Claire and Jamie McTavish, Outlander Jamie Sam Heughan Starz Jamie Fraser
Then the scene that I think really sold me when I reading the book. Teenage girl, Laoghaire, is brought before Colum by her father. He wants her punished for her loose behavior. Colum decrees she should be lashed. Jamie steps up and offers to take her punishment for her, despite his recent shoulder dislocation and gunshot wound. Jamie, being a dude, can choose to be beaten with fists rather than getting lashed. So punisher-man (what a weird job to have) knocks him about for a bit, including one particularly unsporting punch to the shoulder.

Sam Heughan as Jamie Fraser on Outlander Starz Outlander Jamie and Claire, Claire and Jamie McTavish, Outlander Jamie Sam Heughan Starz Jamie Fraser
Claire later tends to Jamie (thank goodness he keeps requiring medical attention) where she learns he basically did it because he's a decent guy. He didn't want Laoghaire to be shamed. It mattered less to him to stand up there and get punched a few times. Awwww.

Overall, this was a very conversation heavy episode. Which I'm fine with. I appreciate that Jamie and Claire aren't instantly in love. She's still thinking about getting back to Frank and Jamie's just living his life whether Claire's around or not. They need to know each other before they can feel anything other than attraction. And talking is how you get there. So - cool. I'm super looking forward to next week. The teaser implied a fairly significant deviation from the novel, but my Outlander buddies and I were speculating it'd be a dream or imagining or something. Any other book readers have any thoughts on that?! It'd be a crazy thing to change... Until then!!

Saturday, August 9, 2014

Angst Initiate: Sam Heughan as Jamie Fraser on Outlander

Me: Helloooo Internet!! I've missed ye greatly.
Internet: Why are you saying "ye" ?!
Me: Because OUTLANDER!!

You guys. You. Guys. I mean it, you guys. Have you watched the premiere of Outlander yet? I can't even. My ability to even has completely vanished. It's been a while since I've felt inspired enough by the angst and awesomeness of a television character to sit down and screen-cap the hell out of a show. But Jamie Freakin Fraser! If you have eyes, or a soul, or a beating heart, you need Outlander in your life. Take my word on this one. San Heughan as Jamie Fraser is perfection.

Outlander screen grab Episode 1 Premiere Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Outlander Starz Jamie Fraser Caitriona Balfe Claire Randall Jamie Claire Jamie x Claire 
If you're unfamiliar with the amazing series of novels by Diana Gabaldon, Outlander tells the tale of Claire Randall, a WWII army nurse who finds herself whisked back in time to the Scottish Highlands circa 1743. There she meets Jamie Fraser, who is basically the best human.

Starting tonight, Starz will be airing sixteen (!!) episodes that cover the first novel. Can I mention how pleased I am that there will be sixteen episodes? Cable shows tend to have seasons in the 10-13 episode range. So score one for you, Starz! The first episode was available online early, and I have to say, I thought it was pretty much perfection.

Outlander Season One Premiere Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Outlander Starz Jamie Fraser Caitriona Balfe Claire Randall Jamie Claire Outlander Jamie x Claire 
The perfection started with the casting. Can we all take a moment and admire Sam Heughan's everything? The hair, the smile, the eyes, the accent, the kilt. It's beyond perfect casting. (Take a drink every time I say something is perfect.) Jamie and Claire's first encounter is one of my favorite sorts of meet-cutes -- the nurse/patient kind. I've talked about my Florence Nightingale syndrome before, and man does this story play into that. Over and over and over and over :D

Outlander Season One Premiere Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Outlander Starz Jamie Fraser Caitriona Balfe Claire Randall Jamie and Claire Outlander S01E01
Jamie's been injured and Claire, captive though she is at this point, is the only one with any medical training in the room. She can't sit idly by and watch the burley Scottish kidnappers do everything all wrong. So she steps in and puts Jamie's shoulder back into joint for him.

Outlander Episode 1 Claire and Jamie Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Outlander Starz Jamie Fraser Caitriona Balfe Claire Randall Jamie and Claire Outlander
Then they set off. Jamie covers her with his plaid to keep her warm in the rain, and also doesn't try to rape her, so already he's winning in the chivalry department.

Outlander Season One Premiere Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Outlander Starz Jamie Fraser Caitriona Balfe Claire Randall Jamie Claire Outlander Jamie x Claire 
As they ride along, Claire is able to use her future knowledge to prevent an attack, but this also momentarily separates her from Jamie. (Booooo never leave Jamie).

Outlander Episode One Claire and Jamie Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Outlander Starz Jamie Fraser Caitriona Balfe Claire Randall Jamie and Claire Outlander
He goes after her and threatens to re-kidnap her in the most charming and adorable way possible.

Outlander Episode One Claire and Jamie Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Outlander Starz Jamie Fraser Caitriona Balfe Claire Randall Jamie and Claire Outlander
Outlander Season One Premiere Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Outlander Starz Jamie Fraser Caitriona Balfe Claire Randall Jamie and Claire Outlander S01E01
Then, as will turn out to be a pattern, Jamie needs more medical attention. As claire uses strange and foreign words like disinfectant and warm compress, the Scottish brood looks on in confusion. The show does a phenomenal job of bringing the lighter sides of Outlander to life by mixing the societal norms of 1945 and 1743. Who else wants to bring "Jesus H. Roosevelt Christ" back into popular usage?

Outlander Season One Premiere Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Outlander Starz Jamie Fraser Caitriona Balfe Claire Randall Jamie and Claire Outlander S01E01
By the end of the episode, the group is returning to Castle Leoch where Claire's adventure (and relationship) will really take off.


Outlander Episode 1 Screen Grab Sam Heughan Jamie Fraser Outlander Jamie Fraser Caitriona Balfe Claire Randall Jamie Claire Outlander Jamie x Claire 
I'm so excited about this show. The novel is such a blast to read, and from how beautiful and well done the pilot was, I have very high expectations. Apart from the adonis that is Sam Heughan, the Scottish countryside is breathtakingly shot and the score by Bear McCreary is spine-tinglingly awesome. I'm bummed it's a whole week until episode two, but until then, there are lots of pretty pictures of Jamie and Claire to ogle. Don't miss this one, ya'll. For realz.

Thursday, October 24, 2013

American Horror Story Coven: Incest, Threesomes, and True Love

Well. I wanted angst and American Horror Story delivered. 

Lily Rabe Misty Day Evan Peters Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Coven Season 3 The Replacements Evan Peters AHS Season 3 Kyle Zoe Misty
The Kyle storyline started tame enough with Misty and Kyle cuddling in her swamp shack. Misty was rambling on about her one and only topic of conversation, Stevie Nicks, and Kyle was a captive audience. It was all very zen. Misty talked about finding one's tribe which definitely seems to be her THING. I might be going out on a limb here, but Misty should consider joining Fleetwood Mac. Then Zoe came in and Kyle's eyes went straight to her. Aww.

Evan Peters Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Coven Season 3 AHS The Replacements Evan Peters AHS Season 3 Kyle Zoe Misty Evan Peters Season 3
Misty was actually pretty happy to see Zoe too. She needed someone else around in order to use Kyle for show-and-tell. Misty ripped open his shirt to display what a great job she'd done covering his seams. And she had done a great job. Congratulations, Misty. Your reward is abandonment.

Evan Peters Kyle Spencer Zoe American Horror Story Coven Season 3 AHS The Replacements Evan Peters AHS Season 3 Kyle shirtless Evan Peters 
Kyle doesn't seem super thrilled with Misty's paws all over him. Perhaps he was reminded of someone else's creepster paws. Maybe it's happening off screen, but I still feel like the logical thing to do is to test his cognition somehow. They do a lot of talking at him but they don't seem to pay a ton of attention to his reactions. Also -- kudos to Evan Peters for having reactions without making Kyle un-FrankenKyle.

Evan Peters Kyle Spencer Zoe American Horror Story Coven Season 3 AHS The Replacements Evan Peters AHS Season 3 Kyle shirtless Evan Peters 
Either way, he seems happiest when looking at Zoe. They're all cute and glowy and blonde. And he wants to play with her hair. Again -- missed opportunity, Zoe. I would have played with his hair right back. It's a good thing his face was so undamaged and his hair so un-singed in the big fiery explosion.

Evan Peters Kyle Spencer Zoe American Horror Story Coven Season 3 AHS The Replacements Evan Peters AHS Season 3 Kyle shirtless Evan Peters 
Evan Peters Kyle Spencer Zoe Taissa Farmiga American Horror Story Coven Season 3 AHS The Replacements AHS Season 3 Kyle Zoe Taissa Evan Peters 
Misty really wants them all to stick together and have a big happy three-way. But Zoe has other plans. After a brief meeting with Kyle's mom during which she confessed that she'd been considering suicide, do-gooder Zoe makes the decision that Kyle should be returned to her. Zoe just pawns this boy off on crazy after crazy. Why not keep him for yourself, Zoe?!

Evan Peters Kyle Spencer Lily Rabe Misty Day Zoe Benson Taissa Farmiga American Horror Story Coven Season 3 AHS The Replacements AHS
Misty really doesn't want them to leave. But with an angry grunt and swing of his arm, Kyle chooses Zoe over Misty. And Misty is left alone. Again. Is there some reason Misty can't go hang out at the school with the other witches? She's pretty and blonde -- she'd fit RIGHT in. And then she'd have a tribe. And a shower.

Lily Rabe Misty Day Evan Peters Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Coven Season 3 The Replacements Evan Peters AHS Season 3 Kyle Zoe Misty
But Zoe doesn't care about Misty. She takes Kyle home and leaves him standing on his mother's front porch. She couldn't even walk him in? Like... come up with a lie, girl! You don't just leave broken boys on front porches. Especially when they clearly prefer you to all other people.

Evan Peters Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Coven Season 3 AHS The Replacements Evan Peters AHS Season 3 Kyle Zoe Evan Peters Season 3 AHS
So Kyle takes a shower and his mother creepily takes note of the fact that he's not actually Kyle from the neck down.

Evan Peters Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Coven Season 3 AHS The Replacements shower Evan Peters AHS Season 3 Kyle Zoe Evan Peters Season 3
Then the big reveal: Kyle's mom is... gross. There's incest. Need I say more?

Evan Peters Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Coven Season 3 AHS incest The Replacements Evan Peters AHS Season 3 Kyle Zoe Evan Peters Season 3
I did NOT see this one coming. It's angsty, that's for sure. Kyle cries while his mom... well. Just fill in the ellipsis for yourself. Anytime you see ellipsis just think "gross." The interesting thing is that Kyle must understand what's going on to a degree. He wouldn't cry otherwise. So he's in there. I couldn't help but wonder what pre-death Kyle must have really been like. Clearly he had a screwed up home life, and yet he was a saintly frat-boy with southern charm up the wazoo.

Evan Peters Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Coven Season 3 AHS incest The Replacements Evan Peters AHS Season 3 Kyle Zoe Evan Peters Season 3
In general, I enjoy the angst that incest causes. I was a big proponent of the Jimmy Darmody freak-show on Boardwalk Empire. But my concern here is that this is actually going to be irrelevant to Kyle's current state. Maybe I'm wrong. Maybe there's some awesome arc to come involving Zoe's inability to have sex without killing and Kyle's presumably damaged psyche. But I think we should all manage our expectations.

Evan Peters Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Coven Season 3 AHS incest The Replacements Evan Peters AHS Season 3 Kyle Zoe Evan Peters Season 3
Anyway. Kyle's mom once again freaks out about his not-Kyle body and then she too rips his shirt open. Then he looses it. He's had his shirt ruined for the last time! He screams and bashes her skull in. His one word seems to be "no" which is a good word for him to have full use of. I think that'll be helpful in terms of all the torso exposing ladies in his life.

Evan Peters Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Coven Season 3 AHS incest The Replacements Evan Peters AHS Season 3 Kyle Zoe Evan Peters Season 3
Then Zoe stops by for dinner and learns, much to her dismay, that Kyle once again needs a shower.

Evan Peters Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Coven Season 3 AHS incest The Replacements Evan Peters AHS Season 3 Kyle Zoe Evan Peters Season 3
And so ends another week of American Horror Story: Mommy Issues. See you next week!

Thursday, October 17, 2013

American Horror Story Coven: Kyle's Boy Parts

American Horror Story: Coven aired its second episode last night. Boy Parts!! Get it? vvv Sorry for the gross out. But  I feel like now we've met the REAL Kyle Spencer. It's the variety of Kyle we'll presumably get for the duration of the season. And ya'll, this set up is pretty freakin' awesome. And by awesome I of course mean angsty.

AHS Coven Evan Peters Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Season 3 Coven Kyle AHS American Horror Story Coven Season 3 Evan Peters AHS S03E02
DAMN that's a gruesome pic. Before I talk about this week's AHS -- did you see all the delightful stuff Ryan Murphy said in his weekly EW interview? Let me draw your attention to the best bits:

"And I just love that he becomes this monster who is only in love and can protect one person, his creator. So it’s sort of a reverse Dr. Frankenstein."
 "Evan is really killing this part this year. The next episode has an insane Kyle/Evan story. He’s such a great actor, and I love what he does physically. He really has risen to the challenge of the part... The question is: Can he be rehabilitated? Can she help him move towards becoming a man? Or is he always going to be a monster? Or is he going to sort of be a combination of both? In the next episode, he says his first word and then he pretty much stays in that mode for a while."

So. Zoe's going to be the only person he can love/protect. Awwww. I dig that SO hard core. It's like he's this wild animal who is only loyal to Zoe.  RM also mentions that Kyle's mom is in next week's episode. I hope he doesn't kill her... but I kind of hope he kills her because it would be a major angst bomb if he ever regains some pre-death cognition.

But. Enough speculating about the future. This past week, we got to see the witchy blondes build their perfect boyfriend. Apparently perfect means covered in stitches, unable to talk, unpredictably violent, and with a few gaping wounds. Also... the face of Evan Peters. Sounds about right.

AHS Coven Evan Peters Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Season 3 Coven Kyle AHS American Horror Story Coven Season 3 Evan Peters AHS S03E02
Taissa Farmiga as Zoe Benson American Horror Story Season 3 Coven Frankenstein Kyle Zoe AHS AHS Coven Season 3 Taissa Farmiga AHS Zoe
First thing homeboy does when he puts back on his mortal coil is bludgeon a guard to death with his forearm. At least, I'm assuming the guard died. But maybe he was just knocked out and went home naked and confused. He was really only there to deliver his car and clothing anyway.

AHS Coven Evan Peters Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Season 3 Coven Kyle AHS American Horror Story Coven Season 3 Evan Peters AHS S03E02
Then Zoe and Kyle go for a little drive. I don't know where her intended destination was but she picks a pretty horrible time to freak FrankenKyle out about the fact that he's been brought back from the dead. He starts thrashing and groaning as only an undead monsterish-type can, until boho-swamp-witch Misty Day pops up and starts back seat driving.

Taissa Farmiga Evan Peters as Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Coven Frankenstein Kyle AHS American Horror Story Coven Season 3 Kyle and Zoe
They go over to Misty's house to listen to some chill tuneage and chat about witchcraft. The whole while, Kyle is twitching in his chair in the corner. But -- cutest of cutenesses -- he seems really distressed when Zoe says she has to leave. He literally clings.

Taissa Farmiga Evan Peters Kyle Spencer Zoe American Horror Story Season 3 Coven Frankenstein Kyle AHS American Horror Story Coven Season 3 Kyle 
Taissa Farmiga Evan Peters as Kyle Spencer American Horror Story Coven Frankenstein Kyle AHS American Horror Story Coven Season 3 Kyle and Zoe

How many of ya'll went "Awwwww" when Kyle grabbed Zoe's hand like that. I know I did (internally... I was in a room with other people. I didn't want to be judged!) How she resisted the urge to provide hugs and comfort I do not know. But he definitely needs a hug. And an explanation. And they should test out how cognizant he really is. All things I'd have done immediately. But whatevs -- patience is  virtue. Or so I'm told. I shall try to remain virtuous until next week!

Thursday, October 10, 2013

American Horror Story Season 3: Kyle Spencer

Guys!! American Horror Story is back! American Horror Story: Coven finally premiered last night and Evan Peters returned in all his blonde glory. Hallelujha -- now it's really Halloween season. 

Taissa Farmiga and Evan Peters on American Horror Story Season 3 Coven Season Three Kyle Spencer Zoe Benson AHS Coven Evan Peters Kyle
His name is Kyle Spencer, his family is poor, he's in college on a scholarship, he's in a fraternity, and he doesn't condone rape. So far, so good. We meet him as he's laying down the law to his fraternity brothers. No puking. No pissing. No public exposure. If only he had added "No gang-banging roofied movie stars" things would have gone differently for him. A missed opportunity, Kyle. Really, it's all your fault.

Taissa Farmiga and Evan Peters on American Horror Story Season 3 Coven Season Three Kyle Spencer Zoe Benson AHS Coven Evan Peters Kyle
Kyle's fellow frat brother, Grey Damon, is basically an evil monster, and for the second time in two years, his character is killed by a witch. At least this time he deserved it. But you know who didn't? Kyle!! Poor Kyle. I'm looking forward to seeing how you look dead.

Taissa Farmiga and Evan Peters on American Horror Story Season 3 Coven Season Three Kyle Spencer Zoe Benson AHS Coven Evan Peters Kyle

Ryan Murphy promised us Romeo and Juliet -- so I'm expecting some major love angst between Zoe and Kyle. Like -- Capulet = living and Montague = dead. Or Capulet = whole and Montague = in pieces. Or... I don't know. Maybe Kyle will be the one dude Zoe can actually screw without damaging. Except then isn't she technically screwing... well. Let's not get into it yet. Guessing with Ryan Murphy is always a dangerous game.

Taissa Farmiga and Evan Peters on American Horror Story Season 3 Coven Season Three Kyle Spencer Zoe Benson AHS Coven Evan Peters Kyle
Yeah. AHS is back. Evan Peters is adorable as always. And I prefer him blonde. Score one, AHS Coven.

Monday, September 30, 2013

Breaking Bad Series Finale: So Long and Thanks for All the Angst

You guys. I don't think I've ever been so pleased by a finale before. After the giant hole of suck that was the Dexter finale, I'm so relieved that Breaking Bad did it right. After all the build up, the BB team had monumental expectations to live up to. And personally, I had a very concrete list of things that I was hoping to see. Happily, I got to see pretty much every single one of them.

Obviously, spoilers to follow. Some in picture form. Beware!!

Breaking Bad Finale Elliot and Gretchen Schwartz Adam Godley Jessica Hecht Bryan Cranston Walter White Breaking Bad Series Finale Felina Breaking Bad
The big thing they had to contend with was how Walt was going to get his money to his family. As necessary as the money arrangements were, long term financial planning isn't the most exciting thing to watch. So they smartly dispensed with the money arrangements right off the bat in a nice little suburban emotional torture scene. It's always nice to see obscenely rich people get inconvenienced by dying meth kings. Always.

Breaking Bad Finale Elliot and Gretchen Schwartz Adam Godley Jessica Hecht Bryan Cranston Walter White Breaking Bad Series Finale Felina Breaking Bad
Just look at the stress he's causing them! For real though -- I'm glad (and impressed) the writers came up with a plausible way for Walt to leave behind his money to his family. And I'm going to choose to believe that Elliot and Gretchen just follow through on everything. Rather than, you know, hire an awesome security team and turn the money in to the DEA. Because that would be a bummer.

Breaking Bad Finale Skylar White Anna Gunn Walter and Skylar Bryan Cranston Walter White Breaking Bad Series Finale Felina Breaking Bad
And then Walt said his goodbyes to his family. Also well done. And also something they sort of had to get through to get to the big finish. Skylar has annoyingly started acting like she actually was a total blameless victim rather than the leader of the money laundering team.  But whatever. It was a satisfying conclusion to his family life. Poor Holly, though, right? She's going to grow up in a screwed up family. And I'm guessing her big bro won't be painting a rosy image of their dearly departed dad. Jesse should come kidnap her. And raise her as Brock's sister. But hold on!! I'm not to Jesse yet.

Breaking Bad Finale Bryan Cranston Walter White Breaking Bad Series Finale Felina Breaking Bad
And bonus!! We didn't have to actually see a scene with Flynn being an annoying little punk. I'm so over that kid. But we can probably assume he'll be sticking with "Flynn" the rest of his life.

And then. Finally. Jesse. Jesse Jesse Jesse. The heart and soul of Breaking Bad. One of THE angstiest characters to ever be. Walt goes to take down the meth-nazis almost entirely because they killed Hank. (And maybe because they robbed him. And maybe because they're still making his meth and he's got a trademark. But mostly because they killed Hank). He doesn't care about getting his money back. He doesn't know until he sees Skylar that they threatened her. He's taking them down and Jesse with them.

When he arrives, he discovers that Jesse isn't their happy little sidekick. Jesse gets led into the meth-nazi drug party in chains, looking like he's been floating on a raft with Wilson for six months. Sidenote: It's a good thing king of the meth-nazis rose to Walt's Marty McFly challenge and didn't just kill him. Because that too would have been a bummer.

Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Pinkman Aaron Paul Breaking Bad Series Finale Felina Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Pinkman
Walt sees just how low Jesse is. And he must know it's his fault. He must know Jesse was just a happy little small-time dealer before Walt came along and ruined his life and crushed his spirit. So. Walt saves Jesse from his awesome automatic trunk-gun of doom. Walt saves Jesse. WALT SAVES JESSE!! That was Giant Thing #1 I wanted for the Breaking Bad finale.

Breaking Bad Finale Jesse Pelmons Todd Breaking Bad Series Finale Felina Breaking Bad Series Finale
And Landry makes it through trunk-apocalypse alive. Just so that Jesse can be the one to kill him. Jesse killing Todd was Giant Thing #2 I wanted for the Breaking Bad finale. Another sidenote: It bums me out that more of the world will know Jesse Plemons as Todd than as Landry. It probably doesn't bum him out because I'm guessing Breaking Bad is the best thing ever to have on your resume. But you guys -- go know Landry on Friday Night Lights if you don't already. He wasn't a crazy psycho killer. He was just an accidental one-time killer...

Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Pinkman Aaron Paul Breaking Bad Series Finale Felina Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Kills Todd Jesse Plemons
So Todd's dead. The rest of the Hank killing nazis are dead. But Walt has been shot. Jesse considers finishing the job.

Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Pinkman Aaron Paul Breaking Bad Series Finale Felina Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Pinkman
Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Pinkman Aaron Paul Breaking Bad Series Finale Felina Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Pinkman
But he doesn't. Jesse does't kill Walt. Good for Jesse. He's done killing. He hates doing it. He always has -- it makes him depressed and forces him to go go-karting.

Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Pinkman Aaron Paul Breaking Bad Series Finale Felina Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Pinkman
Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Pinkman Aaron Paul Breaking Bad Series Finale Felina Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Pinkman
Jesse and Walt share an acknowledgment nod. Perfect perfect perfect. That's as good as it's going to get between these two. After Jane and Brock and everything that went down in the desert, there's no chance of relationship repair. But acknowledgment nod I can buy. Acknowledgement nod is the right way to go.

Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Pinkman Aaron Paul Breaking Bad Series Finale Felina Breaking Bad Series Finale Jesse Pinkman escape
And Jesse breaks free. Breaking Free!! Look at that face ^ He drives straight to Alaska on one tank of gas in that beat up old car and starts his happy life as a fish monger with an adorable girlfriend who's never tried drugs ever. Jesse lives. Giant Thing #3 I really wanted in the Breaking Bad finale. I've been hoping for Jesse's freedom for years now. Thank goodness they allowed it to be. Jesse lives Jesse lives Jesse lives. Make me a t-shirt, world.

Breaking Bad Finale Bryan Cranston Walter White Breaking Bad Series Finale Felina Breaking Bad Walt dead final shot Breaking Bad
And Walt peaces out. Once and for all. Alone in a meth lab, never caught by the cops, never put in jail. He got a little redemption, he got his money to his family, he got Jesse free. Love and hearts and rainbows and smiles for the Breaking Bad finale. Suck it Dexter.